I no longer make New Years resolutions. I’ve been down the path of insanity that is neatly writing a list of (non-food of course) treats to give myself as I achieve each goal. I am reminded of this baffling practice now that the frantic pushes to Set New Years Resolutions! (read: Lose Holiday Fat in the minds of seemingly every advertiser and resolution setter around) are in full swing.
At times like these it is often little things that will re-spark my enthusiasm of just pointing out that human beings have different sizes. And different levels of health. And that no point on either of those, often not-at-all interconnected, spectrums is morally inferior to another. Incredibly thin, incredibly fat; tip top health or death-bed ill: or anything in-between even: none of them are cause for a person to be either lauded or vilified. One such spark came today while browsing through a favorite blog of mine: You Are Remarkable. The post in question was a quote. Rather than copy the whole quote as I am so tempted to do, I will leave you to jog over to that post and see it all in its entirety. Here I will just give a snippet that really keeps resonating with me:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure… Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine…”
There is nothing good about shrinking, either our ideas or our bodies, so that other people won’t feel insecure around us. Forcing ourselves to conform with shrinking bodies in any means at our disposal, just for the sake of not Being Fat at Others does everyone a disservice. Is our deepest fear in accepting ourselves as we truly are, without reservation or limitations, truly that we may find out we are powerful beyond measure? Without restrictions and those mind-corsets we try to impose where the only right body is a thin body, the only “healthy” body is a perfectly figured and abled body, where the only vision is of homogeneous heterosexual cis-gendered beauty molded as per some pre-formed set of requirements; without those sorts of contortionists limits on who we might be capable of being, just how strong and amazing a population COULD we be? If the amazing were not limited to those fitting the right body mold to show up nice in a glossy magazine or an after school special but could be any of us, all of us, how many amazing people would we realize we had in this world, right before our very judgmental eyes?
So how about it? What if you WERE powerful beyond your wildest dreams or imaginings? What if you stopped saying “When I finally lose this weight I’ll finally…” or “When this belly/fat/these thighs/this double chin; is gone, I’ll be able to….” and started instead supplying yourself with “I’m going to do/say today…” No qualifications regarding how your current human shell means you need to first somehow change before you are able to do or say or be the kinds of changes you want to see in the world. Granted, maybe this sounds like new-ageist “Think Positive” crap. Maybe a bit of it is. Finding ways to “liberate yourself from fear” sounds like the sort of self-help book malarkey that I find myself shelving in the library and stifling a snorting giggle.
Yet maybe there is something to be said for taking a look at the reasons behind why we try to put the things we want to do or say or BE behind the dubiously achievable gates of weight-loss goals. Is it because we are afraid of just how responsible we might have to be if we gave ourselves full permission to be human and to be as powerful as we are already in the here and now? What sort of decisions or treats are you holding back on in the hopes of achieving some numerically and quite arbitrarily chosen pound or kilo goal? What sort of person are you hiding behind the hopes of Changing For the Better TM?
“We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”