Mermaid or Whale?

It is not often that I come across a forwarded email and get a chuckle; even those passed along that are labeled as “jokes”. Even less frequently do said same notes bring on the urge to pass it along. The email I got today, however, made me chuckle and smile and not only reminds my of a previous post of mine, but also (for me at least) seems to be a *tad* bit less reminiscent of those Cranky Lady (Maxine?) emails about skidding into your grave with chocolate in one hand and freshly bought shoes in the other; and more of a positive approach to thinking about your life and how relevant your body’s size is to your appreciation of it.

Though, perhaps, it is only through the lens of FA and my struggles to see myself as I am and accept myself for who and what I am that this even brings that though up. If so, thank you FA; for bringing such ideas to my mind, and apparently to that of the person who sent the below to me today. Small changes, make a world of difference; one tiny adjustment at a time.

Recently, in large city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tanned woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said:


A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious
humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia . Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don’t exist.

If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis.  Fish or human? They don’t have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don’t have kids either.  Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale.

P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only
skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my
kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a coffee with my friends. With time we gain weight. [Perhaps] because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.  So we aren’t [just] heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, good gosh, look how smart I am.

[Bracketed words added by myself to enhance just a bit!]

I AM as the whale.  I am not offended if you decide to grace me with that label.  Because I DO feel graceful, majestic at times, larger than life, and happy to swim through my life and take whatever comes my way (or whatever I find in my travels).  Sure, it might be nice to fantasize about being that mermaid. I won’t even deny that the idea would and likely will still cross my mind from time to time. But that doesn’t mean that fantasy must consume my life, making it worthless until said impossible goal is obtained. Quite frankly, I’ll take being the Happy, Sex-having, Playful, Loved, and Wondrous Woman that I already am to being a confused non-existent Creature of Mythology any day!


15 thoughts on “Mermaid or Whale?

    • Yeah, the part that made my day about it was that I could totally see some of the folks here from the sphere actually WRITING something like that. And before peeking into the awesome room that is FA I never would have thought of such an email a more than just a chuckle followed almost immediately by “Well, yeah that’s all good and all but… mermaids!” (Which, hey still think imaginary creatures are awesome and all, but just saying…a lot has changed in my mind set in a year and this sort of thing really brings that message home!)

  1. Well, there’s also our friend Orcinus orca to consider. Doom of Sea Lions, dominator of Sperm Whales, the largest of Great Whites Sharks? Snack Food. Even the biggest mammals on the face of the planet, Blues Whales, know enough to swim the other way when they start hearing Orca song on the edge of their awareness. What does membership in the mythical Sizzling Hotness Merman Club get me? A feature page in the ‘Shallow and Cold Blooded’, Tuna Steak Calender? A seashell neckless (or are plastic six-pack rings the new Marine-metrosexual Vogue)? Maybe, I can get a trident if I’ve got enough followers on my ‘I’m too Sexsea for My Scales’ twitter page? No thanks. I think I’d rather run with the pack in black & white.

  2. This is truly wonderful. Just earlier tonight I was having a down on myself moment about seeing my skinny sister tomorrow and “looking like a whale” in comparison to her. I kid you not: that was the EXACT phrase in my head.

    Thank you for giving me another way to look at this!

  3. April – Hello & how are you?? Another beautiful, positive post. Thanks for sharing this awesome perspective.

    You should always feel graceful, majestic, larger than life, and happy to swim through your life and take whatever comes your way. You have an amazing spirit & you are beautiful!! (all women are beautiful, that’s the cool thing about being a woman)

    Hope your world is doing wonderful, chat at ya soon…


  4. Pingback: Powerful; the fear of being « I AM in shape. ROUND is a shape.

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